Thursday, March 25, 2010

The Michael Masterson Journal

MM Journal

Issue No. 34 - $1.91

Thursday, March 25, 2010


"It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves."

Sir Edmund Hillary

Kilimanjaro

I never wanted to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. In fact, I never wanted to climb anything.

Still, I couldn't say no to Dr. Al Sears again. He is a good friend and an important client. And I'd been demurring on all sorts of hiking and climbing invitations from him for about two years. Besides, since the event was eight months in the future, it was hardly more than a note in my calendar. It wasn't real. It was subject to cancellation. What did I know about Kilimanjaro?

But even then, I never had any illusions that I would actually like it. My idea of a good vacation is sitting at a streetside cafe sipping espresso. The very notion of hiking frightens me. For one thing, I don't like using latrines. For another thing -- and I don't mind admitting this -- I'm a rather clumsy walker.

I trip just walking down city streets. Don't ask me how. I've never understood it myself. My feet seem to be attracted to every bump and crack. One moment I'm striding down Madison Avenue, feeling dapper. The next moment, I'm stumbling forward, flailing my arms to keep from falling.

There is a lot to talk about here -- including the fact that within 48 hours of accepting Dr. Sears's invitation, I had invited two other people to come with us. One was a colleague. Another was a high-school chum.

Why did I bring two more people to the party?

For one thing, it allowed us to have a climbing group of our own. We could plan our own itinerary. We could have our own cabins. And we wouldn't have to make silly conversation with strangers.

But mostly, I felt that by bringing together three people whom I liked and admired we could all have an experience that was more than just a climb. And I was right. Our group of four become fast friends -- and I think that friendship will endure, because the deepest friendships are always forged in misery. (More about that misery a little later...)

The Making of a Working Team

Dr. Sears was our mountain man. His beard and golden locks hung over his shoulders like a lion's mane. He had hiked several of the most challenging mountains in the world. It was his idea to hike this one.

Daryl, an executive with my largest client, was our technology expert. Inside his solar-paneled backpack was every electronic device a mountaineer could ever expect to need in any sort of situation. As it turned out, we needed all of them.

And Kevin, my high school buddy, brought the good humor and stiff upper lip of a retiree who had dealt with and defeated just about every medical condition that middle age thrusts upon us.

As for me, I'm not sure what I brought to the table. I was the guy who had promised Kevin and Daryl that they would have a really great time. So if Dr. Sears was the idea man behind this thing, I guess I was the promoter -- which made me feel somewhat responsible for its outcome.

We worked well together. No one was bossy. No one was bitchy. Everyone pulled his own weight and was helpful whenever he could be.

And that made a big difference. Because we were about to endure six days of living hell. I know for sure that I would have failed and might have even perished on that mountain without my team.

A Great and Stupid Myth of Leadership

The success of our team got me thinking about leadership.

The conventional view is that success in business is a one-man event. A man takes a look around and thinks, "I can build a better mousetrap." He builds it and everyone, including great employees, beats a path to his doorstep.

That's not the way it happens. Most successful businesses are formed out of partnerships. The partnership includes the innovator who gets the idea, and the actuator who makes it real by showing his support and connecting the innovator with the rest of the world.

Steve Jobs has always been the charismatic face of Apple. But it was actually founding partner Steve Wozniak who had the programming prowess to create the company's signature computers.

Thomas Edison was, of course, a genius. But his light bulb and other inventions wouldn't have spread so far so fast if his work hadn't been bankrolled by J.P. Morgan and the Vanderbilt family.

Bill Gates is Microsoft. But as the company grew, his childhood friend Paul Allen was with him every step of the way. In fact, he urged Gates to start the company.

One man is the innovator. The other is the actuator. Both are equally important -- but since the media believes in the myth of the Sole Creator, only one of them get the credit.

What should you take from this? That if you own, or hope to own, your own business, you should seriously consider having a partner.

There are some advantages to being a lone dog. The biggest one? You don't have to share the profits.

But the advantages of having a partner are many and great. You will have a much better chance of achieving profitability, and there will be no limit to how big you can grow.

Without the actuator, the innovator is an eccentric shouting in the void. Without the innovator, the actuator is a wasted talent.

Innovators who attempt to run their own businesses without partnering with actuators usually find that their businesses flare and then fizzle -- and they don't know why. The reason is that they have made the all too common mistake of thinking that successful businesses are led by a single person.

This is a subject that deserves a book. But I will make this point and then get back to Mount Kilimanjaro. If you are an actuator, don't settle for an executive position. Become a partner. If you are an innovator, don't think you are being smart in hiring an employee to take care of business. Look for a partner.

Fear of Flying

I managed to ignore the trip almost entirely until about two weeks before our departure date. Only then did I look at our travel itinerary and agenda. Together, they spelled bloody horror.

We were to begin with a 17-hour series of flights from Palm Beach International Airport through Newark and Amsterdam to Tanzania. We would get to our hotel near the mountain by around 10:00 p.m., check in, get to bed by about midnight, and get started at 7:00 a.m.

I've spent thousands of hours in planes. But I've never enjoyed them. It has to do with altitude. The higher you go, the less air pressure there is. That's why they pressurize the cabins in jet planes -- but only to about one-fourth the air pressure we're used to on the ground. (It has to do with fuel consumption.) So you wind up with about the same amount of air pressure -- and oxygen -- as you'd find on a ski run in Denver, which is about a mile above sea level.

When I'm in Denver I get mild headaches, nosebleeds, and have difficulty breathing. Walking up a short flight of steps gets me huffing and puffing.

So that's one reason I don't like flying. It beats up my body. But there is another reason too: I'm sensitive to airborne viruses. If I spend hours confined in a locked cabin with 150 other people, there is a good chance I will wake up with a cold or the flu the next morning (which, indeed, happened on this trip).

If your body doesn't like flying, there are a few things you can do to minimize the effects:

  • Do not drink alcohol. Not wine. Not beer. Nothing. Never.

  • Drink lots of water.

  • Drink coffee. Coffee is a vasoconstrictor. It narrows the blood vessels -- and that is an antidote to being in a pressurized cabin for a long period of time.

Ready, Fire, Aim

I had agreed to fly to Tanzania and climb the mountain, but I was not ready to do so. Not at all.

Aside from needing a visa (which my assistant was able to get for me before I had to leave), there was the question of gear. According to the literature from the organization in charge of our trip, everything I needed had to fit in a single duffle bag and weigh no more than 40 pounds. The problem with that was that, in climbing a 19,650 foot mountain, we would be passing through four climates zones -- starting from a tropical savannah and ending at something that resembled the moon.

My solution was to throw in a pair of hiking boots and a Swiss Army knife, along with a bunch of golf clothes and skiing clothes. But when K saw what I'd done, she had me unpack everything and start from scratch. We spent several hours one night (painfully for me, happily for her) identifying the items I had, buying those I didn't have, and double-checking everything against three separate lists she had culled from hundreds on the Internet.

It seemed like a terrible waste of time but, as it turned out, I needed every single item K packed. In fact, the only item I didn't use was an "emergency survival kit" that she told me not to buy. (I bought it anyway, but did not unseal it. Good thing, that.)

As you know, my motto in business is Ready... Fire... Aim. Same thing goes for anything big that you want to accomplish (like climbing a mountain). Don't wait for everything to be perfect. Get ready. Then fire.

But be sure to get ready. If you are inclined to shoot from the hip, as I am, you need to find someone to make sure your pistols are clean and loaded before you walk into the bar.

And I Was Off

Finally, the day arrived. I said a teary goodbye to K. (I was actually blubbering, I think. She seemed rather rosy.) Lou drove me to the airport. When he handed me my bags, he must have seen the fear in my eyes. As we shook hands, he pulled me to him and gave me that half-hug men are so fond of. "You'll do good, kid," he told me. Then he drove away.

The trip to from West Palm Beach, Florida to Moshi, Tanzania was about as good as a 17-hour series of flights could be.

Apart from some bumpy air and one of the worst landings I've ever experienced, the majority of the trip was routine.

We were met at the airport by a nice young African man who spoke no English but carried a sign with our names on it. He cheerfully helped us with our luggage, got us into an SUV, and drove us to the Keys Hotel. The ride took about 90 minutes. It was dark and dusty. We were tired. I remember almost nothing about it.

I do remember my first impression of the hotel -- a walled structure made up of half a dozen two-story cinderblock bunkers. "Surely, this driver has the wrong idea," I thought. "He must have us confused with a group of military advisors. This must be a military compound. It cannot be a hotel!"

It was.

The inside of the rooms were standard military: painted concrete, stone floors, a cold water shower that dripped rather than poured, and huge holes in the screening to let the bugs in.

I was too tired to care. I got under the sheets and fell asleep.

The Death March Begins

The next morning, I woke up with what felt like the beginning symptoms of bronchitis.

I dragged myself out of bed and joined my friends in the hotel lobby at 7:00 a.m. to meet our guide. He was about 28 years old, tall and good-looking with a gap between his two front teeth. He introduced himself as Raymond. "Do you have any questions?" he asked.

I had about a million, starting with "How can you call this a hotel?" -- but I bit my tongue.

Then he had his assistants weigh our duffle bags. And that is when we found out that the limit was not 40 pounds, as we'd been told, but 33 pounds. Something apparently had been lost in translation.

So we spent a few minutes sorting quickly through everything we'd brought and eliminating about 20 percent of it.

That is how I managed to leave my razor, deodorant, snow boots and -- because I was rushed -- my cell phone charger at the hotel.

As we bade goodbye to the Keys Hotel, my mind was clouded with lingering dread. Yet I was happy not to have to spend another night there. (As it turned out, I would spend another night there -- and I would find it delightful.)

The vehicle that transported us to the mountain can only be described as a jalopy. Halfway to our destination, it overheated and then broke down completely. How did I know it was halfway? Because I asked the driver and he told me. He seemed to think that halfway was an accomplishment. He seemed proud.

After waiting on the side of the road for about an hour, a slightly less ancient vehicle pulled up in front of us. Several porters loaded our bags on top of it and we got on board. In 45 minutes, we were at the Marangu Gate, our adventure's official starting point.

How to Sell Anything to Anyone

But before taking us through the gate, our driver pulled into a funky strip of four or five "shops."

The first group of merchants all seemed to be selling things we might need. Ponchos. Ropes. Walking poles. If we didn't have them, they assured us, it would be catastrophic.

Next came the purveyors of T-shirts and wristbands and necklaces. They didn't pretend their products would save our lives. But they were quite certain that if we didn't buy them, we would miss out on the "experience" of Mount Kilimanjaro.

We did our best to support these earnest entrepreneurs. But no matter how much we bought, they never seemed completely satisfied. Our guides looked on from a modest distance. They were clearly amused.

One fellow in particular impressed me. I bought a T-shirt from him and then he sold me a bracelet. The moment he got my money in his hands, he tried to sell me a necklace. I told him that I don't wear necklaces. He kept at it for a few more minutes and then went back to selling me T-shirts. So long as my heart was beating, this guy was going to pester me for a sale.

I'll tell you one thing about third-world merchants. In terms of guts and persistence, they are equal to the best salespeople in the world. Perhaps it is because they are so desperate. For them it's not about a nicer car. It's about putting food on the table.

I've talked about how important drive is in making sales. In one essay, I characterized it as "the Junkie's Secret." Some crack addicts earn more each day than some junior executives. They do it without without any training. They just hustle.

If they can do it, anyone can. I tell you, if I had a sales organization, I'd be happy to employ any one of those Tanzanian street vendors.

The Odds Were in Our Favor, but Just Barely

We got back on the bus, went through the gate, and rode up to the registration office. While we were waiting for Raymond to sign us in, we talked about the challenge that was before us.

K had told me that the particular route we were taking, Marangu Route -- or the "Coca Cola route," as the locals called it -- was one of the tougher ascents. According to what she'd read, only 6 out of 10 people who attempted it made it.

When K told me that I had mixed reactions: apprehension because I would have preferred to have taken the easiest route but relief because I had been dismayed to learn that Jessica Biel had reached the summit only weeks before. (She had taken one of the easier routes.)

"That's nothing," Daryl said when I mentioned this fact to my friends. "Did you know that 60 people a year die trying to hike to the top?"

Check out rule #2 - I broke that rule and paid for it

I hadn't known. And I wished he hadn't told me. Besides being a bad walker and susceptible to altitude sickness, I am afraid of heights. But greater even than my fear of heights is my fear of death. I didn't like the thought that I was spending a lot of money to do something that might result in my early demise.

After we finished that depressing conversation, we looked at the signs posted for prospective hikers -- large brown placards on which all sorts of admonishments and warnings were printed in yellow.

For example, we found out that:

  • Hiking above 15,000 feet could cause sudden death. (We were hiking to 19,650 feet.)

  • If we got seriously injured above 12,000 feet, we could not be rescued by helicopter because helicopters can't fly that high.

  • Anyone with a cold should not ascend more than 9,000 feet. (I had developed a definite case of bronchitis by that time.)

How to Heal a Sports Injury

But I wasn't worried about my cold. At least not at that point. I was worried about my left leg. As luck would have it, I'd strained my Achilles tendon a few days earlier. I was limping. Not badly, but limping nevertheless. Dr. Sears said, "See how you feel when you start hiking. It might work itself out."

I thought he was just trying to get me to keep my commitment. But turns out he was right. Within an hour, my calf had loosened up and the pain went away.

That brings up an interesting subject: how best to heal sports injuries. In the old days, orthopedists recommended immobilizing the injury for several weeks or even months and then getting therapy. Nowadays, many doctors like to get the joint in operation as soon as possible. And in my experience (I've had two Achilles tendon operations, a meniscus repair, and an ACL replacement), that approach works better and faster.(Check out this Total Health Breakthroughs article for more guidelines.) 

Words Cannot Convey the Bliss...

Raymond came back with the required documents in hand, and stuffed them in his chest pocket. "Ready?" he asked.

"Ready!" we said, putting on our sunglasses and adjusting our walking poles. And with that, we were off.

I was mildly surprised that there was no little prep speech from Raymond or words of advice or something more to transition us from wannabe hikers to the real thing. It was simply that one word -- "Ready" -- and we began what became our predominant activity of the next four days: walking uphill.

How can I describe the walking?

If you've never hiked Mount Kilimanjaro, I can say this: It is nothing like what you may have imagined. It is not exhilarating. It is not majestic. It is not rapturous or transcendental or any other adjective that outdoorsy people use when they attempt to entice you into their lifestyle.

A much better set of adjectives would be:

  • Hellish
  • Painful
  • Unbearable
  • Insane

The drill is this: You begin your climb at 5,000 feet (about the altitude of Denver) and walk about 52,000 linear feet (10 miles) every day. That would be nothing if you weren't going uphill. I can cover 10 miles in less than two hours without breaking a sweat. But when, in addition to covering those miles, you are ascending 4,000 feet, everything changes.

For one thing, the demand on your heart and lungs surges. For another thing, as you ascend there is less oxygen in the air to feed your heart and lungs. This is what it felt like to me: After a few minutes, my heart was pounding and my breathing was heavy -- the way it would be if I were trying to run as fast as I could for an hour.

In other words, each step becomes a physical challenge. Each inhalation is labored. After an hour, you are ready to quit but you cannot. If your guide is kind, he may allow you stop for five minutes to have some water and adjust your equipment. But then it's up and at it again. For a second hour. And then a third hour. And then a short lunch. And then three hours more.

Cold as a Witch's...

And while this is happening, it is getting colder. Mount Kilimanjaro stands at the equator. In February, the average daytime temperature at the base of the mountain could be 80 or 90 degrees. But at the summit, the temperature ranges from 0 to minus 15 degrees.

As you ascend, it's about 15 degrees cooler during each day. And there is another 10-degree drop -- at least -- at night.

It's not cold when you start out. But by the time you are at the top, it is well below freezing. And with wind. And rain. Or sleet. For us, it was sleet.

That kind of cold isn't extreme if you have a way to get warm. The problem with climbing Mount Kilimanjaro is that there is no way to get warm. Your inner garments are soaked with sweat from six hours of incredible exertion. You can strip them off at night, but don't expect to be able to wear them again. They will stay cold and wet until the day you leave.

Is this beginning to sound like a litany of complaints?

I'm Saying This for Your Own Good

I don't mean it to be. I want to convey to you what this experience is like. Because you might one day want to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. You need to know what to expect. And you certainly won't find the truth in travel brochures.

So let me share a few more details.

The ascent takes four days. The descent takes two. The ascent is unbelievably hard on your heart and lungs. But the descent can be crippling to your hips, knees, and feet.

You will be in some form of pain the entire time you are hiking. And even when you are resting, you will be cold and wet.

Actual toilets with toilet seats exist only at the first campsite. Thereafter, you will be using open bowls and holes in the ground. The floors and often the latrines themselves will be covered in shit. You will not care, however. You will be happy to use these "facilities," because the food you will have eaten will have given you diarrhea.

Oh, by the way. Don't forget to bring your own toilet paper. None will be provided for you.

As for the living quarters along the way, most of them are small A-frames that contain four "beds." They are not really beds at all. Just wooden rails that hold mattresses so thin that you could feel a pea through them even if you weren't a princess. The space is so small that only one person at a time can get up and get dressed. And the structure is entirely without insulation. Even with four bodies in a tight space, the air temperature is just a few degrees warmer than the outside.

Our Itinerary -- How Does This Sound?

Day One: Fifteen minutes into it, my calf was feeling better but I was concerned by how hard it was to walk. The trail itself was well maintained and not especially steep. Yet it felt steep. "Surely the trail will flatten out in a while," I thought. But that never happened.

After about five hours of hiking, I was exhausted. "What the hell am I doing here?" I asked myself. But I wasn't going to quit and abandon my teammates. I vowed to push on. That is when it suddenly became cold and dark and started to rain. I had been sweating. Now I was freezing. Then, just as suddenly, the rain stopped and the sun came out. We made it to the campsite, known as Mandara Hut. Altitude: 8,000 feet.

Day Two: I woke up tired. We had a good breakfast and set off again. The trail was steeper this time and, as we ascended, rockier. The rocks made walking more difficult. We had to pay attention to our footfalls. It would be easy to turn an ankle.

Under the lightweight jacket K had bought I wore a cotton shirt. It became soaked with sweat and, as the temperature dropped, I could see that cotton was a mistake. I eventually took it off and wore the outer jacket only.

We didn't talk as we walked. We couldn't because the hiking was too difficult. I remember from my cub scout days that the proper pace for hiking was to go as fast as you could while maintaining a conversation. Our guides could converse at this pace. But we couldn't. We were breathing hard and wondering when we would have our next break.

Although Day One felt very hard, Day Two was much harder. Not unbearably hard, but as hard as something can be and still be bearable. We bore it. But just barely.

I wondered later whether the people who designed the trail didn't specifically create the first leg the way they did. It is challenging but nothing like the rest of the climb. In fact, each day was harder than the one before. Had it been otherwise, we might have given up. Altitude: 12,000 feet.

Day Three: At 12,000 feet, Horombo Hut is about as high as a ski lift will take you in Colorado. People don't normally live at 12,000 feet. The air is too thin. And so, to make sure we could acclimatize to Mount Kilimanjaro's 19,650-foot summit, we spent the day at Horombo and took a three-hour hike to about 14,000 feet.

I learned something that day about hiking in high altitudes. It is much, much easier to hike three hours than it is to hike six hours. And not by a degree of 100 percent. It is much more like 1,000 percent.

As I mentioned earlier, there are other approaches to the peak that are considerably easier and, thus, have a much higher success rate. Why we took this one, I don't know. But I'll say this: If anyone says they climbed Mount Kilimanjaro and it wasn't that hard, they are either lying or they didn't take the damned Coca Cola trail.

Spending the third day at 12,000 feet and taking that hike to 14,000 feet was a good move. It gave us a little rest, and we went to bed confident that we could make the next goal: hiking up to Kibo Hut, which stands at 15,500 feet.

Dr. Sears seems genuinely happy, doesn't he? My mood is genuine too

Day Four: And the next day, that is exactly what we did. But it was colder and harder than we expected. The terrain became very rocky with lots of switchbacks and hundreds of opportunities to twist an ankle or fall off a crater rim.

Yes, you can fall down the side of the mountain at any number of places on the climb. But by the time you get to those trails, you no longer care whether you fall or not. You are putting one foot in front of the other. You are staring at the ground. You are thinking about nothing. You are trying not to think. Because the only thing possible to think about is your pain.

From Hades to Hell and Back

Day Five: We had heard that Kibo Hut was terrible -- crude, rude, etc. But we actually liked it better than the other campsites -- because instead of those stupid A-frames, it has one big barracks with bunk beds. We had a room that could accommodate eight people. Desperate for a little space after being cramped for so long, we resorted to bribery in order to be allowed to occupy the room by ourselves. There was even a table and chairs in the room so we could have our dinner without leaving the building.

You wouldn't want to leave the building. It was freezing and windy and before long it was hailing. The hailstones weren't big but they hit hard. We huddled inside, eating our tasteless soup and abominable stew and drinking canned coffee. At 7:00 p.m., we were in our sleeping bags trying to get some sleep.

At midnight, we were awakened to start the ascent to the peak. We had some biscuits and tea and were outside climbing again by 1:00. The hail had been replaced by a steady snowfall. It was very cold and very dark. We wore our warmest jackets and used headlamps to guide us.

It was beautiful... of course I couldn't appreciate it then. Always take photos

It didn't seem possible, but the ascent to Gillman's Point was even worse that the ascent to Kibo Hut. My bronchitis had only worsened on the climb. I had a runny nose and a fever. Every step felt impossible to take. Yet I took them.

We climbed in the cold, over the snow covered trail and upward along narrow switchbacks of stone and gravel. My breathing was loud. Everyone in our group could hear it. Daryl had charged up my iPhone and I was listening to music, which helped a great deal. If I had any thoughts in my head, I can't remember them now. I remember only putting one foot in front of the other and telling myself that eventually it would be over.

Finally, after six hours, we reached Gillman's Point. Technically, this meant that we had reached the summit. But this was not the only summit. Some two hours away stood a higher summit: Uhuru Peak -- the one that is Mecca for hikers.

When Yours Truly Fell Apart

But everyone knew that I was on my last legs. Raymond had a device that measures oxygen in the tissues. Dr. Sears used it to examine me. A good count is 97 or 98. If it falls below 90 in the states, you are usually put on oxygen. When you are at extremely high altitudes, a lower count is expected. Raymond said that as long as the count was about 80 he had been told not to worry.

My count was 73. "If it drops below 70, you could be in serious danger," Dr. Sears said.

Then he decided to make sure Raymond's little appliance was working. So he tested it on our guide. It read 93. He then tested it on himself: 86.

"See that," I thought. "We're all hiking under duress. And I have bronchitis besides. There is no oxygen going to my vital organs. No wonder I am dragging."

"If you want," Dr. Sears said, "We can all go back now. We've reached the summit."

"But it's not the highest point," I said bravely.

I looked at Daryl. He seemed beat. Then I looked at Kevin. Like me, Kevin was nearing in on his 60th birthday. I expected him to be in my sort of shape at this point in the climb -- meaning bad. But he looked kind of okay. "He doesn't have bronchitis," I thought. I asked Dr. Sears to test Kevin's oxygen.

Big mistake. He tested at 70.

Dr. Sears couldn't believe it. He retested him, and it was 70 again.

"You should be gasping for breath," he told Kevin.

"I feel pretty good," he said.

"There is no medical explanation for this," Dr. Sears said.

Kevin was smiling. Why was he smiling?

"I'll give you an explanation," I said. "The son of a bitch is a vampire!"

"Check his pulse," Daryl said.

We didn't. I think we were all afraid.

"Let's get going," I said, pulling myself to my feet. "I don't need no bloody oxygen."

"Are you sure?" Kevin asked. "What do you think your chances of finishing are? Better than 60 percent?"

"Ninety-nine percent," I told him. But I was bluffing.

Vampires and Zombies

The next two hours were not as difficult as the previous six had been, but I was getting weaker. Every once in a while I began to cough, and my coughing was deep and exhausting. We pushed on, poli poli (slowly slowly) as the locals say. And finally, Raymond put his hand on my shoulder and motioned for me to look ahead. There it was. The sign on top of the summit. We had conquered Mount Kilimanjaro.

Here we are, finally, at the top... triumphantly ignorant of the hellish hikes ahead of us

I was very happy but I was too tired to enjoy it. I sat down and settled into a blur. Some time later, I got together with the guys for a group photo. Then, looking at me as if he were concerned, Raymond urged us to start our descent.

The ascent was not the relief I had hoped it would be. I had completely exhausted myself going from Gillman's Point to Uhuru Peak. I had nothing left in me but I did my best to keep up with the others. I couldn't. They moved ahead. I slowed down. Raymond stayed with me.

It took three hours for us to get down to Kibo Hut. The last hour, I was walking like a zombie. Like I was dead.

Raymond walked with me to the door and said, "After a good meal you'll feel better."

I didn't say anything but I knew what he meant. We couldn't stay at Kibo Hut for more than an hour. We had to hike another three hours down to Horombo. But I knew I wouldn't make that hike. I didn't have the energy to take another step.

I did my zombie shuffle into our room and, with my teammates looking on slack jawed, walked passed the table of food and crawled into my cot.

When the guys started getting ready for the next hike I told them I wasn't going with them. You can't stay here, Dr. Sears said. It's too high. You will get sick.

"I'm already sick," I said. "And I'm going to stay."

He called for Raymond to get him a stethoscope. He examined my lungs and took my temperature and used that oxygen-measuring device. In every department, I was in bad shape.

This guy can't go on," he told Raymond. Raymond seemed upset.

Blessed Relief

"What about a stretcher?" Dr. Sears said.

"It's a lot of red tape to get one," Raymond said, "but I'll check it out."

A half-hour later, I was strapped to a stretcher -- really a metal rack suspended on a bike tire. And with four men, one on each side, I was transported from Kibo Hut to Horombo, 4,000 feet below.

It was a very bumpy journey. I was half-delirious but happy to be headed toward a lower altitude. At one point, they stopped and tilted the stretcher forward. I had the sensation that I was at the edge of a cliff and they were about to dump me over. I'd be one of the 60 people who died this year. I almost didn't care.

Back in our first A-frame, I curled up in bed and stayed there until the next morning. When I woke up, Dr. Sears examined me. I was considerably better in almost every regard. "One thing, though," he told me. "You have to get a complete exam when you get home. I think you have walking pneumonia."

I hadn't wanted to go on that climb. But I went. And even though I made jokes about how I had no intention of finishing it, I did feel, deep inside, that I would make it or die trying.

Mandatory Philosophic Speculation

What does this say about me? I don't know. Dr. Sears and Kevin and Daryl all had their own reasons for pushing themselves to the top of that mountain and their own difficulties along the way. I hardly saw the landscape, beautiful as it was, because I was looking at the ground. I don't have funny stories to tell, because there were none.

But I will say this about climbing Mount Kilimanjaro. If there is a better way to test the limits of your endurance, I don't know it.

There is a saying among Tanzanians: "If you have never climbed Kilimanjaro, then you will never know what it is like. If you have climbed it once, then you do. If you have climbed it more than once, there is something wrong with you."

I won't climb Kilimanjaro again. But I will be proud that I did it once for the rest of my life. By the time I've told this story a dozen times, it will seem much more dramatic than it does now. If I live long enough to tell the tale to my grandchildren, my feat will seem mightier than Jon Krakauer's in Into Thin Air. (If you haven't read the book, I recommend it.)

Dr. Sears, who has climbed half a dozen tough mountains, tells me that, as time passes, I'll forget about the pain and remember only the fun. "What fun?" I asked. He just smiled.

But I did it. (Though Kevin says I need to put an asterisk on my certificate for the stretcher ride I got.) And nothing I've done so far in business (or ever expect to do) will take that kind of willpower.

Which is a good thing, when you think about it.

[Ed. Note: Michael Masterson welcomes your questions and comments. Send him a message at AskMichael@ETRFeedback.com.]

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