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|Wednesday September 29, 2010|
The Awesome Power of WIIFT
Are you familiar with station WIIFM?
It stands for "What's In It For Me?" And it's the "station" our minds are attuned to 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365.25 days a year. (Had to take leap year into account.)
I'm talking about the constant patter in your head when you are listening to someone, reading something, watching TV, doing A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G and E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G.
"What in it for me?" you think." What is the BENEFIT I'm going to get from doing this? Why should I do this?"
When you watch a commercial on TV, you're thinking: "What's in it for me?"
When you read a sales letter, you're thinking: "What's in it for me?"
When you're talking with someone, you're thinking: "What's in it for me?"
When you're daydreaming or thinking about the future, you're thinking: "What's in it for me?"
It's been said that humans are unpredictable creatures. But you can count on them for one thing with absolute 100% total titanium certainty: WIIFM.
My First Experience With WIIFM
My first experience with WIIFM came when I was seven years old and read Dale Carnegie's classic How to Win Friends and Influence People.
(Yes, I really did read that book at age seven. I saw it on my dad's bookshelf and thought it sounded like a neat title. If you don't believe me, ask my mother.)
Anyway, one of the things Carnegie said in the book was this:
"Remember that the people you are talking to are a hundred times more interested in themselves and their wants and problems than they are in you and your problems. A person's toothache means more to that person than a famine in China that kills a million people. A boil on one's neck interests one more than forty earthquakes in Africa. Think of that the next time you start a conversation."
Wow! That blew my little seven-year-old mind. I had no idea people were so selfish.
"Selfish." That was the only word I could think of to describe that behavior. So I made a commitment NOT to talk about myself.
Now I have no idea why I decided to do that. Looking back on it today, of course, the answer is simple: Because I wanted to "feel special." (See? Even that was a WIIFM.)
So I decided to listen to everyone else, never offering my opinion about how I felt or what was important to me.
Needless to say, it made me miserable.
Years later, I finally realized that I was going about it all wrong. It wasn't that I had to stop asking for what I wanted or become some kind of martyr.
I simply needed to find a balance between WIIFM and WIIFT -- What's In It For Me and What's In It For THEM.
People ask me, "Noah, how did you get so many endorsements from the biggest names in the business -- superstars like Stephen Covey, Harvey Mackay, Jack Canfield, Joe Vitale, John Gray, Harv Eker and MaryEllen Tribby?"
Simple: by framing every sentence I utter in terms of What's In It For THEM.
What you want and what they want do not have to be at odds. 99 times out of 100, there's a way for both of you to get what you want -- or something darn close to it.
2. Do your research.
Visit the website of the person or company you want to do business with. See what they're up to. Who are their key players... what are they working on... what's important to them?
You'd be amazed at how many e-mails I get that start with "Dear Sir or Madam..."
3. Give honest appreciation.
When I first met Jack Canfield at an awards ceremony back in 1998, the first words out of my mouth were, "Hello, Mr. Canfield. I've been a fan of yours for a long time."
It may sound kind of lame. But I meant it.
I went on to tell him how I'd been seeing him everywhere online. And remember, this was years before most people even had a website!
So he got the message that I was not just another "fan" but someone who had really done his homework. That got his attention.
4. Ask better questions.
I've written about Afformations before in ETR -- empowering questions you ask yourself that help you manifest your desires faster and easier. In addition to Afformations, when you talk with people, ask questions that start with Who, What, Where, Why, When, or How.
These open-ended questions lead to deeper answers than just "yes" or "no." Not only that... you're asking about what's important to THEM, not you!
5. Come up with ways to help others win.
You're looking for that wonderful Win Cubed (Win x Win x Win) situation where everyone wins.
Here are a few things you can do for others to help THEM win:
Once you tune yourself to radio station WIIFT, you'll find that people are much more willing to help you.
Is that something you want to do? Of course it is. Why? Because of WIIFY (You)!
[Ed. Note: Noah St. John, Ph.D., is the #1 bestselling author of The Secret Code of Success: 7 Hidden Steps to More Wealth and Happiness. As Jack Canfield says, "Noah's work represents one of the most significant breakthroughs in the study of success in decades." You can get the first 3 chapters of The Secret Code of Success FREE at www.NoahStJohn.com.
You may have seen Noah on CNN, ABC, NBC, in The Washington Post and PARADE Magazine. And now you can meet Noah St. John live and in person at Early to Rise's Info-Marketing Bootcamp this November. Noah is one of the dozen experts we've invited to teach budding entrepreneurs how to start and grow an online business. We've also got experts in every aspect of Internet marketing strategy, including e-mail list building, front-end and back-end products, copywriting, pay-per-click ads, social media, and much, much more.
"Wonderful insights and practical advice."
"You are a very wise man. Your article about friendship offered great advice and, more important, a profound understanding of the human being.
"When we are looking for love and approval and have an agenda for how it is meant to be, we can expect mostly failure. A true gift to others is to give without expectations. Then there is the potential for miracles (like the $40,000 check in the mail you mentioned).
"Thank you for all your wonderful insights and the practical advice you give on a regular basis."
"P.S. I purchased Bob Cox's Epiphany Alliance program in January and signed up for extended coaching sessions through ETR. It has been one of the most rewarding experiences in my life. Bob has been there on a business level through some difficult times, and keeps navigating me through the treacherous waters of entrepreneurship to safer waters."
Today's Words That Work: Bloviate
To bloviate (BLOH-vee-ate) -- an Americanism -- is to speak aimlessly and at great length in a pompous or boasting manner.
Example (as used by Fiona Mazel in a New York Times review of You Were Wrong by Matthew Sharpe): "Here's a formula I just learned: math teacher (hapless, feckless) plus stepdad (bloviating jackass) plus interloping cabal of unsavory characters equals a pleasingly odd and intelligent novel in the hands of Matthew Sharpe."
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